I want to keep our friendship, that’s why I haven’t confronted you about this whole thing, because I don’t want things to end up like last time.

But the least you could do is talk to me. I know you lied. Don’t do the same thing as last time. Talk to me about it. Apologize. Don’t act like it didn’t happen.

You promised me things were different this time.

Be the person I know you are.

Be the person that keeps their promises.

You were my best fucking friend and you just walked away. Did it ever occur to you that I might need you like you need me? That I might need you to be there for me like I was there for you? Nooooope. Why would you think of anyone but your own fucking self? What’s even worse is I know you weren’t a selfish person to begin with. But you turned into one. What sucks even more is that for a time, even if you were selfish, you were still there for me.

Then you walked away.

And every fucking day I just want to go up to you and hit you and tell you I miss you. But you probably wouldn’t even notice it because you’re too fucking high to realize what just happened.

I’m not sorry for being a bitch. I’m sorry you’re an asshole.

Why? Because even though I don’t know if we’ll get back together, I know that I still have the best friendship in the world.

and I love you even more than yesterday. And yesterday, I didn’t think that was possible because I love you so much.

I’m in love with you.

whether it makes me happy or sad.

I’m always relieved after and I always feel better.

I think my mind just likes to test itself.